When Pain Won’t Go Away
by Annie Yorty
Have you ever accidentally touched a hot stove? Almost before your brain can fully register the wound, you yank your hand off the burner. Humans naturally avoid pain. But what about when pain won’t go away?
Chronic Pain
As a young kid, I’d lie on the floor squeezing my aching head between my palms with all my might. As a teen, I’d ignore the feeling of a vise gripping my temple and pretend the pain didn’t interfere with my life. As an adult, I took numerous medications to relieve almost daily migraines.
I just wanted the pain to go away.
I’m sure you’ve experienced physical pain. I know some of you suffer from unrelenting aches every day.
None of us escapes emotional anguish either. We react to emotional pain in much the same way as to physical pain. We just want to leave it behind.
No Easy Answers to Pain
I would need far more than a short blog to address the reason God allows us to experience pain. Others have already explored that question far better than I. One I recommend is C.S. Lewis, who wrote The Problem of Pain.
My mission is to encourage and inspire you to look up from the twists and turns of life to perceive God—His Person, presence, provision, and purpose. From my own experience with both physical and emotional pain, though, I know that such advice often sounds trite—and downright impossible.
So what should we do when pain won’t go away?
I suggest a two-pronged approach that fully acknowledges the pain and fully acknowledges God at the same time.
Fully Acknowledge Pain
The more I study God’s word, the more I believe He is pleased when we run to tell Him all about our troubles. God devoted one entire book of the Bible, Lamentations, to pouring out pain and grief to God. Lamentations literally means “to cry aloud.” That’s exactly what the author did for five chapters.
Are Christians allowed to whine to God? Share on XKing David also penned many psalms in which he complained to God about his distress. His graphic descriptions and vehement feelings may shock you.
Listen to his blunt cry in Psalm 142:4.
I look for someone to come and help me, but no one gives me a passing thought! No one will help me; no one cares a bit what happens to me. (NLT)
David’s raw lament touched God’s heart.
God cares about your pain too.
Instead of denying or trying to escape your pain, run to God. He’s ready to hear and bear your physical and emotional anguish no matter the source—even self-inflicted wounds. He understands it all.
Telling God the details of your pain requires intense focus. A jeweler dons magnifying lenses to bring a diamond up close for inspection. Grasping it between his tongs, he turns it over and over under a light to examine every facet. God gives you permission to do the same with your painful experiences.
For example, if your father abandoned you as a child, explore how his betrayal felt at the time and how it affected your future worldview. Did you feel unworthy, unlovable, alone, helpless? What self-protection did you institute that affects future relationships? Do you choose to withhold trust? Has your ability to love your spouse or children been stunted?
When you expose these hurts to God, you invite His nurturing Spirit to apply the balm of truth.
If you’ve been a Christian for a while, you may hear a little warning bell. Aren’t we supposed to focus on God instead of our problem? After all, the Bible says of Jesus, “Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame” (Hebrews 12:2 NLT).
Please keep reading to see how we overlay the nature of pain with the nurture of God.
Acknowledge and Trust God
Jesus showed us how to divulge our pain while at the same time focusing on God. He never denied the horrible reality of the cross. In the Garden of Gethsemane shortly before crucifixion, the distress He felt during His conversation with His Father resulted in the extreme physical symptom of sweating drops of blood.
At the same time, Jesus saw the character of His Father on full display. That view enabled Him to endure the physical and emotional torture He would experience.
Long before Jesus lived on earth, David demonstrated this same understanding.
In Psalm 142, David weaves the thread of God’s nurture throughout his lament. The first verse refers to the Lord’s mercy, while verse two implies God listens and cares. Verse three calls on God’s wisdom. In the fifth verse, David seeks God as his safe place.
Double Vision
In physical sight, each eye sends its own image to the brain. The brain merges them into a single picture.
We need this type of spiritual double vision when pain won’t go away.
Like Jesus and David, we must consider the nature of our pain through one eye while the other eye focuses on God’s nurture. As the two images merge, God’s nurturing care superimposes over the pain.
With this merged perspective, we can trust God, even when we cannot discern a purpose for our pain. We can resist the urge to flee. We receive strength to endure until God relieves our distress.
Learn the Character of God
Life is littered with unbearable pain, more than we can possibly endure on our own. As one who suffered for years, I have learned the importance of bringing my pain into focus and overlaying it with God’s nurture. No other pain management technique will suffice.
Do you know the character of God? Is your understanding of His nurturing care sufficient to allow you to perceive His goodness amidst pain?
Is your knowledge of God’s character sufficient to allow you to perceive His goodness amidst pain? Share on XIf you’re not sure, I encourage you to begin a journey of discovery. Start a journal page on which you compile a running list of words and verse references about God’s character.
When you find yourself waist-deep in pain that won’t go away, experience God’s nurture as you pour out your troubles to Him.
Join the conversation:
Would you share a truth about God that has ministered to you in a time of pain?
I welcome your comments!
Copyright ©Annie Yorty 2023
Celebrate God
21 Comments
Nancy E. Head
I’m so sorry you’ve suffered with such pain in your life, Annie. I love that God hears and understands every bit of whining we do in that kind of circumstance.
Your pain gives much credence to your message that God is good even when we hurt. God bless, comfort, and heal.
Annie Yorty
Amen, Nancy. God is always good. Thank you for your sympathy. We have troubles in this world, but God meets us right in the middle of them. Thankfully, my migraines occur far less frequently these days.
Barbara Latta
We live in a fallen world and our enemy’s purpose is to cause us pain and suffering. He tried to get Job to curse God through the pain yet this righteous man stayed faithful. We have no better remedy for our pain than to run to our Father. He is the balm that heals our hurting souls and bodies.
Annie Yorty
So true, Barbara. We can learn much from Job and from God’s response to him. We have a God who loves us and helps us.
JD Wininger
Having been on a two-year journey to find a solution, even a short-lived one, to pain, I can appreciate this post on many levels Ms. Annie. I loved your question about “whining to God”. So often, Satan will want to tell us that “if God truly loved you, He would not allow this pain in your life.” I think of Job’s wife in those moments and remind myself that while I can’t understand it, I don’t have to. What I have to do is to trust God in the moment, trial, or afflction, knowing that He will bring good from it. I don’t have to like it, and I am sure not bashful about letting God know I don’t like it. Still, in Him I trust. In Him, I will cling. God’s blessings precious soul.
Annie Yorty
It’s so easy to believe Satan’s lies when we’re hurting. He knows all the buttons to push. I love your honesty, J.D. – “I don’t have to like it.” I’m so thankful God loves us so much that He not only allows us to pour out our hearts to Him, but He also wants us to do it!
Joanne Viola
I am so sorry you have suffered with daily migraines. While I also get them, they have not been daily. I am so grateful God is big enough to handle our whines, in fact, I think there is no better place to go with them than to Him. I am also grateful for His grace and mercy as He invites us into His Word and breathes hope and peace into our souls, growing a deeper trust in Him. Beautiful post!
Annie Yorty
Joanne, thanks for adding to the conversation. Thankfully, my migraines are under much better control these days. I don’t look forward to pain, but I must admit that I have learned to be closer to Father at these times. Blessings to you!
Katherine Pasour
I think our Father is big enough to handle our whining, that’s not to say that I believe we should whine 24/7. However, our Father loves us and He’s a great listener. I think He wants us to pour out our pain to Him. THEN, we need to pray, study His Word, to listen and discern what path He wants for us. Your post brought back a lot of memories for me, Annie. It wasn’t until I was able to trust and submit to God, that I could deal with the pain of trauma from the past. Thank you for sharing this inspiring message.
Annie Yorty
Katherine, thank you for sharing this testimony of God’s goodness to you. He is the only One who can truly heal deep wounds from the past. I like how you strike a balance on whining. When we whine to God, it’s productive, propelling us to healing. When we wallow and simply whine to ourselves, we cannot move forward. You’ve given some great insight to add to the conversation.
Debbie Wilson
Annie, pain is so absorbing and can be debilitating. I love how God recorded Lamentations and the Psalms. He cares and collects our tears in a bottle. What a Savior!
Annie Yorty
You’ve reminded me of an incredible verse, Debbie. I’ve wondered why He collects our tears, and I’ve come to the conclusion that He values every part of us and uses even our tears to beautify us. Thank you for adding to this important conversation.
Maureen Miller
Thank you for this. So many I know struggling with chronic pain, in various ways. A great post to share.
Annie Yorty
Maureen, it’s a problem common to all. And I think emotional wounds often cut deeper than physical pain. I’m glad you visited and shared your thoughts.
Yvonne Morgan
So sorry for your pain but so glad you are able to use it as an encouragement to others in their suffering. Thank you Annie
Annie Yorty
Yvonne, thank you for visiting. I appreciate your encouragement.
Jeannie Waters
Annie, your comparison of our physical vision to our focus on pain acknowledges our human condition while allowing God’s perspective to “superimpose” our view. Thank you for this useful and scriptutal tool for daily life. Powerful!
Annie Yorty
Thank you, Jeannie, for visiting. I’m glad God allows us to encourage one another.
Jen Knight
I really needed this. This has been an incredibly hard week. Thank you.
Annie Yorty
I’m so sorry you’re in the valley of pain right now, Jen. I pray God meets you there in a powerful way, and I trust He’s leading you to His healing.
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